Resolution. Revolution? Evolution?
'Tis the season for making resolutions. I have but one. Get my life moving in a direction I'll be happy with long-term. Or at least begin to take steps in that direction. How's that for a biggie?
CB recently posed to me the question "Imagine you knew you would die suddenly exactly one year from today. What would you do with that year?" The standard answers sprang to mind ... get off my ass and travel the world. Spend more time w/important people in my life. Dandy answers, nothing wrong with them at all, except if I followed those answers, in the end, I think I'd die feeling like a hollow, wasted man. I mean, what would I really have accomplished? What would I have contributed? And just what is accomplishment, anyway?
My next reaction was to modify the question to reduce the immediacy of it: "Imagine you knew you would die suddenly exactly 60 years from today. What would you do with those years?" Same question, longer timeframe, same uncertainty, still uncomfortable, just more of a cop out. But the more I start to think about this, the more it starts to freak me out. Strange thing is this is something I've been thinking about a lot for the past year, and still for whatever reason since CB posed the question, it's really been bothering me more than ever before.
I don't have the answer to either of these questions, but I know I'm not currently on the right path. I mean the path I'm on isn't totally horrible, it's treated me fairly well, but it doesn't sit right. I've been sucking at the corporate teat for far too long. Not thinking enough, and feeling like I'm accomplishing even less. I mean, I think a *lot* at work, but it's all "work think" which, while at times interesting, still falls into the category of "making money for the man." And not doing much for the common good.
It all comes down to "life focus", I suppose. The question of life focus seems to be so simple for those whose goals are what I'll generically call "the american dream." Fall in love, get married, start your little nuclear family, raise those children to the best of your abilities, they have grandkids, you retire. Bingo. Mission Accomplished. Your life is complete as you live vicariously through your offspring and feel like you've acheived as much as you could provided you've raised them well and they seem to be on a good path. Ok, maybe I'm making broad generalizations here - but I do think it is just this simple for a majority of people.
But all this flies out the window really freakin' fast as soon as raising a family isn't part of the plan. It forces you to really start analyzing what you want from life - what you want to give, what you want to take, what impact you hope to have - any positive impact - and how you might accomplish that.
So now what?
CB recently posed to me the question "Imagine you knew you would die suddenly exactly one year from today. What would you do with that year?" The standard answers sprang to mind ... get off my ass and travel the world. Spend more time w/important people in my life. Dandy answers, nothing wrong with them at all, except if I followed those answers, in the end, I think I'd die feeling like a hollow, wasted man. I mean, what would I really have accomplished? What would I have contributed? And just what is accomplishment, anyway?
My next reaction was to modify the question to reduce the immediacy of it: "Imagine you knew you would die suddenly exactly 60 years from today. What would you do with those years?" Same question, longer timeframe, same uncertainty, still uncomfortable, just more of a cop out. But the more I start to think about this, the more it starts to freak me out. Strange thing is this is something I've been thinking about a lot for the past year, and still for whatever reason since CB posed the question, it's really been bothering me more than ever before.
I don't have the answer to either of these questions, but I know I'm not currently on the right path. I mean the path I'm on isn't totally horrible, it's treated me fairly well, but it doesn't sit right. I've been sucking at the corporate teat for far too long. Not thinking enough, and feeling like I'm accomplishing even less. I mean, I think a *lot* at work, but it's all "work think" which, while at times interesting, still falls into the category of "making money for the man." And not doing much for the common good.
It all comes down to "life focus", I suppose. The question of life focus seems to be so simple for those whose goals are what I'll generically call "the american dream." Fall in love, get married, start your little nuclear family, raise those children to the best of your abilities, they have grandkids, you retire. Bingo. Mission Accomplished. Your life is complete as you live vicariously through your offspring and feel like you've acheived as much as you could provided you've raised them well and they seem to be on a good path. Ok, maybe I'm making broad generalizations here - but I do think it is just this simple for a majority of people.
But all this flies out the window really freakin' fast as soon as raising a family isn't part of the plan. It forces you to really start analyzing what you want from life - what you want to give, what you want to take, what impact you hope to have - any positive impact - and how you might accomplish that.
So now what?
posted by equipoise at 2:49 PM
1 Comments:
I'm trying to think more and more in terms of a "good path" and as "life as a continuum" rather than "big goals". I'll keep my eyes peeled for more on your blog - thanks!
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